Am I the only one who is surprised at how old they are? I mean I was 19 very “recently” next thing I am not! How did this happen? The most interesting part about this unacceptable surprise is that I don’t ever feel my age, I feel like I am a teenager still. Although I never act like one, no thank you!
I recently worked at a health institution, and I would assist clients who wanted to reach their health goals. I had the privilege of being able to see people’s ID numbers (social security). Before noticing my clients date of birth, I would assume they were “old”, I would refer to them using elderly endearments, as a form of respect. Until I had to pay attention to their date of births, then I would see that these people are my age, and sometimes even younger, and then I’d start thinking; “this is how others probably see me too”.
These experiences have made me more compassionate of those that have chosen to act like children even in their old age. Getting older can be scary, and even embarrassing, it can make us feel outdated sometimes, because we start to lose touch with the hip and happening things that the next generation is in to. There’s a societal expectation that comes with getting older, and there’s a way we are perceived which is different from when we were teenagers. These expectations can sometimes add pressure, and can also influence our decisions.
Thus sometimes we make resolutions that are never achieved; because I am overweight, it is expected of me, to have a new years resolution geared towards body goals or I am a 30 something year old, and I have to marry the first guy that comes along because I am running out of time. We start making goals to meet the expectations of others and their standards. Which ultimately causes us to feel defeated when we don’t reach those goals, because trying to please people will always leave us empty.
New year, Old me! As it is a new year, and I happen to be an older version of myself than I was a decade ago; It is totally okay that my resolution is not marriage, instead its growing and building my business. I resolute, to inspire others to be successful entrepreneurs, and writers. Despite the sociatile pressure and expectations, I choose to do what I believe my creator is calling me to do. If I get married, Great! However that is not my focus, that will happen when God says it’s time, now my focus is my purpose. Having the latter mentioned goals is not wrong, as long as it's what you really want, not what you think you are expected to do.
It's a new year, and you are an older version of you. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself, I want you to give yourself permission, to plan, and set-goals that are true to who you are. Don’t rush anything, take time away from the noise, connect to your creator, and figure out what you are supposed to be doing and what your purpose is; what is it you really want to do this new decade? What makes you come alive? Start working towards that.
What I started doing in recent years is to set holistic goals; spiritual, mind, financial and body, this way I ensure that I live a balanced, healthy lifestyle.
This year let’s be true to ourselves, let’s be authentic! It’s a new year, we are older and much wiser. Let’s make this year, a year to remember!
Remember to enjoy the ride, enjoy the blessings coming your way and have fun!
By: Zintle Ncipa
Certified Life Coach and Author